15 Comments Add yours

  1. John Wiswell says:

    This has one of the strongest voices I’ve read from you, in narrative or dialogue. Feels very personal, and the haste at the end works well.

    minor typos: third paragraph, “solice” for “solace”; fourth, “scury” for “scurry”

    1. laradunning says:

      Thank you John. I am trying to improve and become a stronger writer in different POV voices. This piece is a work I wrote in grad school and shortened it down drastically for this flash.

  2. Deanna Schrayer says:

    Yes, I agree, very strong and personal voice here, and that last line is a humdinger! Well done!

    1. laradunning says:

      Thank you Deanna!

  3. Laura, once more you intrigue and pull me into … I should say you pull me down into the moment where I can feel the cold, the release and then the eventual light of day to bring back “reality.”

    Lovely, and as always, thanks 🙂

    1. laradunning says:

      Thank you. I think I edited and re-edtied this more than any other flash I’ve written.

  4. Steve Murphy says:

    Hi Lara, just come across your blog by chance but am very intrigued and looking forward to future flashfictions. All the best, Steve.

    1. laradunning says:

      Thanks for stopping by! Great to meet you.

  5. Aidan Fritz says:

    Intriguing voice. I know the coldness keeps away the demons that are waiting to torment me. Now I know why I like sleeping in cold rooms with lots of blankets.

    1. laradunning says:

      LOL, me too!

  6. writeanne says:

    Great piece of ‘flash’, Lara. Very atmospheric. It’s weirdly comforting. Love that last sentence.

  7. Jessie White says:

    Nice piece of fiction. I love the descriptive style you use.

  8. Martin Olson says:

    This is excellent flash fiction. I look forward to reading your other writing.

  9. Craig Smith says:

    Brings some vivid and creepy images to mind. Well done 🙂

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